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Ambiguous Loss

A term not often used, 'ambiguous loss' is a long and complicated loss which is uncertain or ambiguous; usually not openly acknowledged, publicly mourned or socially supported, as there is often no closure or resolution. Those suffering become ‘stuck’ due to a lack of clarity and compassion – unable to grieve or move forward; forcing them to live uncontrollably in limbo; affecting them psychologically and physically. This can result in exclusion from society, isolation, depression, anxiety, stress or cause other issues which interfere with daily life.

Ambiguous loss is when someone is physically absent but psychologically present such as with missing people, children leaving home or divorce; or psychologically absent but physically present; with mental health problems, dementia or addiction. It’s described as the most stressful kind of loss, typically without a chance to say goodbye. 

A loss can affect identity, meaning and purpose in life and cause waves of intense emotions. One minute you may feel hope, and the next complete hopelessness. Is a loss of health or relationship affecting you? Or do you have someone missing in your life? It may be that you are currently experiencing uncertainty or caring for someone who is. It may be that you fear for the future of our planet with our current climate crisis.

"Ambiguous loss makes us feel incompetent. It erodes our sense of mastery and destroys 
our belief in the world as a fair, orderly and manageable place"
 - Pauline Boss

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